I'm a boring mf

Talking online makes me realize just how little I have to contribute to a conversation. Most of my interactions online are just bandwagoning or jumping on a hype train about some topic, and not really anything of worth or positive contribution. I have no topics beyond basic banter or dumb jokes — usually related to gooning of all things.

All my life, I like to think I’ve spent a nice amount of time-consuming information, in any form, but mostly through entertainment media such as anime. Yet, I still can never come up with a new thing to talk about, as I always get caught lagging behind. I basically have no niches because nothing I have an interest in is that underground to be considered unpopular, and as such is already known by others. This isn’t just about anime, literally take any topic, and I’ll end up left behind as the uncultured one.

I have no music taste; the few cool artists I know were recommended by friends. The only “niche” anime I’ve watched are called “Bikini Warriors” & “Dogeza”, both of which are just short anime about suggestive stuff. I’ve read a few manga I wouldn’t expect others to know, but it’s not like they’re some hidden gems I tell others about, or even remember the details myself. My new website layout itself, while made manually is just a rip-off of the System24 theme. Like these cases, there are many other areas where I just don’t have any valuable content to show, I would call myself basic, but I feel even them mfs are more in touch.

At the end of the day, I somehow manage to stay somewhat social online, but IRL I couldn’t hold a conversation with anybody before running dry. It’s not like there are topics that I can talk about to people elsewhere but can’t/don’t online, or vice versa. If I end up in a situation where I need to make small talk, even that fails.

I guess what I want to say is I don’t understand how I ended up where I did with the friends I did. But thanks.