Kuroweb

I used to be — and to be honest, still quite am — very obsessed with my online username, Lel. You could see this with how I used to add the “Top Lel” hat on to the subjectively “aesthetic” images of anime girls. Alongside that, I used to name many other things with the three letter “lel” in mind.

In the following years of me adopting this username, I mostly only talked to the same few people, only occasionally speaking with someone unfamiliar. When I did talk with others though, it was quite fun; alongside that, as I talked mostly on Discord, I was kind of annoyed and with how the server the friends mentioned were in was managed. I was fond of cool Discord bots with stupid funny features, many channels for sending loads of different stuff, and especially (the lack of) censorship. So with all this in mind, I made my own Discord server.

Originally I called it the Leltard asylum, an asylum for retards like me or something. I don't know what I was thinking. I half made it because of the reasons mentioned above and half because I was just curious of the features Discord had as a server owner, the customization, and the many bots I could add, all managed by me. It sounded pretty fun, even if not many people besides me used it. I registered the server on some sites like disboard and the like but didn't expect to receive many people, and I didn't. I did, however, get a couple interesting members from the disboard-like sites; once someone sent gore and was being edgy, so I kicked them. Another time someone kept sending trans porn and had esex with the AI bot; it was fun. But then, as I also had an invite link in my discord bio, a member from nekoweb joined.

Kuroweb was a hedonistic den of polygamistic debauchery, or at least it seemed to be like that to some. Truly, though, it was just what I wanted Leltard Asylum to be—a place for friends where I did a bunch of the management stuff and could have people fuck around and do whatever. It wasn't a new server; in fact it was just Leltard Asylum renamed to KuroNekoWeb, which later just became Kuroweb, and it just became what it was on chance. I wasn't expecting anyone to join, and even if someone did, I didn't expect them to talk much, but after a little while more people came or were invited, and we talked more and more.

After a while, it did have to be put down, kind of like an online catboy growing out his beard after twink-death. Not only did I ban everyone who said they didn't want to be associated with what was like the piss-reeking crack den of indie websites. I also ended up losing my old Discord account because of Discord's awful content moderation. Now Kuroweb is in limbo until, I think, 2030, because Discord thinks I'm 7 years old.

Kuroweb defined what my time spent online right now is about; it congregated the group of people that would shape each other, even if only ever so slightly, for their upcoming years. Every interaction you or I have affects how we think about anything and changes us for the future. What I am now is because of every single thing around me, and even if I want to let go sometimes, they are what made me into me, and I wouldn't give up that past.

I just wanted to write about this server and how different people have had an effect on who I am. I believe they are all bad influences, and I'm a bad influence on them, but addictions are hard to break, and I'm addicted to my friends.